It’s been a while since I last wrote and that honestly infuriates me so much, because I know that I have the capability to make this blog GOOD, to connect more with a community, that right now, I don’t have time to talk to. I want to apologize to myself, because I know blogging is what I love and that I need to give myself more time to write and to you guys, because I honestly miss reading your posts and I’m going to try and catch up after writing this!
Anyway, I’ve been away, because of the level of schoolwork and general life stuff that’s engulfed all my free time completely and it’s made me think, why? Why do I spend more time doing homework in subjects I’m not even interested in perusing, rather than continuing to build up my skills in writing, something I’m interested in doing for my entire life?
I’m incredibly privileged to be able to go to school and I think I value learning more than most. I understand I need to pass my GCSEs in order to comply with the system. Yes, grades are important, yes you should be proud if you do well, BUT THERE IS SO MUCH MORE TO BE PROUD OF. My whole world is school and all my self worth seems to stem from my academic successes, but surely my writing, blogging and reading is just as important? I don’t feel comfortable sacrificing time allocated for schoolwork to further my skills in a field I’m interested in perusing, because I won’t get an A* on my report card by doing it.
I just feel that I’ve got my priorities all messed up, putting school at the top of my list is for comfort and control, but maybe I need to step out the box slightly in order to achieve my aspirations. It’s always the idea that ‘I don’t have enough time’ but the thing is, I can’t find or make time, the same quantity of it is always going to be there, it’s just how I utilize it.
Thank you so much for reading,