The Fabric of a Virgin – a poem + discussion

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The Virgin Spring photographed by Julia Hetta

The fabric of a virgin
By Alexandra Harrison

These clothes
They are old and worn
Sweat worked into the fabric
Fading lines
And tough caught skin
In every stitch
Of grey and black

Stains pressed on skirts
And scrubbed away with haste
Dirt on the ankles
Lace broken and snapping
(Not so delicate anymore)
Fabric floating in warm baths
Like dark jellyfish
In an artificial ocean

Tight wired corsets
Squeezing flesh like a machine
Into a copy of a woman
Of this modern age
Harsh impressions on the skin
Bleeding red
Like an English rose

Disconnected from the human form
Beaten hands protruding from the sleeves
Like gentle aliens
Heavy skirts concealing legs
Untouched and secretive
Covered with dark hairs
Pushing from the skin
Patterned with blue veins

These clothes are my companions for
Secrecy and the destruction of my shame
They are refinements
Purifiers
Only they have seen my nakedness
And they quiver, as his hand touches my waist

 

My poem portrays a young woman who is living in the nineteenth century. Her clothes, as described in the poem, symbolize her innocence and purity and the poem uses this to demonstrate the girl’s psychological evolution into womanhood, finishing of course with her first (and probably only) romantic and sexual relationship.

Sex with a man for the first time, is something of which would have been very important and possibly overwhelming for a woman of that era and of course, even in modern times, many women feel the same. These clothes give her comfort and in the last stanza (which switches narratives) she says ‘These clothes are my companions for secrecy and the destruction of my shame’  Taking them off symbolizes a new stage in her life, something of which she doesn’t necessarily not welcome, but is anxious about.

Even though this poem is set in an historical era,  I believe that the issues addressed remain the same. For example, some girls, as part of their religion, choose to wear a head scarf, but I have seen people criticize them for this and the religion in general for making girls wear them, but when the girls themselves were asked, many of them felt uncomfortable taking their head scarf off in public.

We need to recognize that all women feel comfortable doing different things and that this should be their decision. Their choices may be influenced by their culture, religion or social background, but they should be fundamentally their own. For example loosing their virginity for one person may be unimportant, but for another it is a very important moment.  And that difference should be okay, choosing to have sex can be a very personal, private thing and we should not criticize either end of the spectrum.

We should not judge the girl I portray in the poem, for holding such an attachment to her clothes, clothes she has grown with, but of which she even criticizes, because she is well aware of the current issues facing women of her time ‘Squeezing flesh like a machine, into a copy of a woman, of this modern age’  Just because she is apprehensive about sex does not make her old fashioned. But empathize with how her clothes represent how she has lived her life so far and how it is difficult for her to just let go, when as described in the poem, these clothes hold the essence of her life so far. They are ‘old and worn’ and they have been her companions  throughout childhood.

Other women’s decisions should not impact your opinion on other women. If a woman wishes to cover herself that is fine. If a woman wishes to wear little clothes, that is also  fine. If a woman wishes to remain a virgin, that is fine. If a woman wishes to have a lot of sex, as long as she is respecting herself and the person she is doing it with, that is also fine. Do not label women as ‘prude’ or ‘slutty’ but admire their strength and confidence to make their own decisions about how they want to live their life. For putting their beliefs first, when our so called society is telling them otherwise. Respect their emotions and opinions and allow young girls to grow the way they want to, without society shoving sexist slurs down their throat.

Opinions on this poem would be greatly appreciated :)!

Thank you so much for reading,

Alex